Random Rant 2018 (the last one?)

Always Searching <3

Rant, rant, rant! It has been more than a few months since I’ve uploaded anything since I’ve written a random rant. I take “breaks” from my blog from time to time. Some of the breaks are intentional, which means I really don’t feel like writing anything (or I’m dealing with some personal stuff, and I don’t write about that). Other times, I really have NO TIME to even breathe or get a good night’s sleep. So, blogging isn’t high on my priority list. What was the cause of my latest hiatus? Many things, my dear friends. One of them was my health, which is great now, thank God. Speaking of God… the two of us have developed an interesting relationship.

Before I dive into my rekindled relationship with the Lord, I’d like to let you know this blog is a fun rant, not like some previous rants I’ve written before. Those were confusing, right? Well, bad news. This one might be confusing, as well, LOL! But I won’t be dragging anyone nor complaining about anyone. This is a post where I also get a little personal (just a little) because I do that from time to time. So, this is one of those times.

This might be will be the last random rants post for this year. As you know, I like to rant, so… brace yourselves (sorry in advance).

Let’s see, I mentioned my health. When you come to China and apply for a residence permit, you have to do a full body checkup. They check for everything. When you receive your results, they give you a pretty little maroon book with all of your information in it. In all of those pretty books, I’ve read that I’m anemic. But since no one has ever pulled me aside and said, “Hey, this is something serious, you need to have it looked at,” I just thought, “A few pills, and that’s it!” I was wrong, of course.

After my disastrous trip to Guangzhou, I went to Amsterdam for three weeks. I had other plans, but I lost my scholarship. The money I had saved up for my travels around Europe, was given a different destination. It went to my last year’s tuition and room fees here in Xiamen. Why the Chinese government decided to cancel my visa in my third year of studies, I have no idea. If I’d have to guess… I think it’s because the scholarship has been available for overseas government officials for thirteen years, and I’m the ONLY ONE who’s ever shown interest. It sucked big time because I had a choice to make: either pay for my last year of studies OR go back home with three years of Business Chinese under my belt and consider it a waste of time.

Three years of learning the Chinese language, then I’d have to stop one year shy of graduation? Not going to happen.

I had some money left, went to Amsterdam to spend some time with family. One of my cousins gave birth to a lovely little girl over a year ago, and I really wanted to meet her. Omigosh, she is THE CUTEST! I love her!!! She has her own personality and she shows it every single time. What surprised me, is that she warmed up to me IMMEDIATELY! She let me hold her, play with her, which is amazing, according to her mother. She doesn’t really welcome strangers. I love her so much! We had such an amazing time together. She can’t talk yet, but we had the most wonderful conversations. Maybe it is because I did most of the talking, and she just sat there looking pretty cute with the biggest smile on her face. She’s my “dinnetje” (“dinnetje” comes from “vriendinnetje,” which means “little girlfriend” in Dutch).

Random Rant 2018 – Unconditional love for my Dinnetje

I realized I’m pretty amazing with kids. Actually, I already knew that. My niece and I would spend time with one another during the end of the year. My sister and parents would go wherever it is they go, to celebrate the end of the year. I’m not into large crowds, especially not when the sun is at its happiest, so I’d always stay home. Bella and I would spend time together watching cartoons, and eating some snacks. But Bella could already talk and she was potty-trained, so I didn’t have to get “down and dirty,” you know. And Bella and I could really talk… A LOT! We talked about a lot of stuff while watching whatever cartoon she was into at that time. Heaven knows I’ve watched a lot of “Peppa Pig” episodes.

So, back to my random fun rant, LOL. <3

My Dinnetje and I had the most amazing conversations. She helped me comb my hair, pack my bags, she was always there to make me smile. I enjoyed her company so much that I realized something: I like little kids now.

Even though kids are cute, they’re also scary. You don’t know what they want, because they can’t speak, so they cry… a lot. They are cute and all, but whenever a child would look at me too long, I’d be like, “Okay, where’s your mommy? Let’s go find your mommy.”

Now, I’ve conquered my fear of children!

Oh yeah, my health… Yeah, so… For three years I’ve read in that book that I’m anemic. Since no one told me that it was serious (and I also didn’t think to ask), I assumed it wasn’t a big problem. I had noticed I’d been experiencing shortness of breath, dizziness, constant headaches, chest pains, what-have-you. But I thought it was due to something else. I told my aunt about it, my mom’s little sister who lives in Amsterdam, and she made an appointment with her doctor for me. She’s “Auntie Drama.”

Whenever someone talks about having a cold, she already sees you having a heart attack. So, I was at the doctor the next day. I was SEVERELY anemic. They were thinking of giving me a blood transfusion AND an iron transfusion. It was THAT serious. Well, I’m in good health now, thankful for that!

I’ve realized just how important it is to take good care of yourself.

This is a pretty long blog. I’ll write about one more thing, then I’ll go to part two.

What else did I do? I tried online dating again. Remember I tried that a few years ago, just out of curiosity? Well, my cousin convinced me to install Tinder on my phone, we created a profile and went through dating profiles together. LOL! Wow, I wish I had some screenshots of what some guys sent me. Not that I’d share them here, LOL! But it would have been nice for my personal archive. Why did I choose to start an online dating profile? I don’t like online dating, not only because of MTV’s CatFish, but online is where you (usually) meet The Killer. Just ask everyone who has died on an episode of Investigation Discovery’s Web Of Lies… Oh, and I suggest you watch Dirty John, as well.

Random Rant 2018 – Tinder and The Killer, LOL!

I have been single for a year now. Not that I’m looking, I’m not. This also doesn’t mean that I’ve closed myself off to dating, no, not at all. If I have a date, cool, if I don’t have a date, cool. Whatever happens, happens. It was more of a test, to see what my market value is. When I do plan to start dating again (with the purpose of finding someone I can build a life with), I know my market value is pretty darn good. I already knew that, but validation is always nice, hihi.

Here’s a little tip for you fine gentlemen out there…

So, gentlemen, any guys reading this who might be interested in dating me in the future, you better polish that CV, because it’s going to be competitive. And when I say this, I’m not talking about money and other materialistic things. I have what I need, not wanting for anything financially. But what I am talking about, is polishing your personality. 🙂

Okay Lovelies, this is a very long blog. I’m going to write a part two, so click here.


Tiara Ray

I am grateful & blessed to have the life I live. (Soon to be) Traditionally published & self-published author in her mid-thirties. I unsuccessfully tried changing this picture numerous times, so I just left it. I wish you lots of love & may you get what you need. <3

One Comment

Comments are closed.